Parents always want to know how much their kids should be eating. Whether they’re infants or teenagers, parents will ALWAYS be concerned that their kids aren’t eating enough- ALWAYS. I’m fairly certain that there is something about becoming a parents that changes our genes or something. So fairly often I’m asked by parents what serving sizes their kids “should” be eating.
The thing is though, think back on your day, as to how many times you consulted the serving size of a food before eating it. Our plates and bowls and cups tend to be much larger than the serving size of the foods we eat. Don’t believe me? Try measuring 1 cup of cereal in a measuring cup and then transferring it to your cereal bowl. I would wager a bet that your bowl probably holds almost twice as much as the serving size. And that’s okay! I’m not here to ruin anyones breakfast bowl or to tell you that eating more than the serving size on the back of the box is a bad thing. But our tendency to underestimate portion sizes (ie. serve ourselves much more than what would be considered a serving size) can sometimes add unnecessary stress to meal times when our kids don’t eat as much as we think they should have.
Picture this- a celebrity chef puts a 32 oz steak and a whole pot of rice on your plate. Looking at that amount of food might is a little bit overwhelming and you wonder how you could finish it all. You take a few bites and you like it, so you eat until you’re full but when you look down it doesn’t even look like you made a dent! You don’t want the chef to feel bad because they worked so hard making it and they are looking at you encouragingly to see if you’re enjoying. So you keep eating and eating until you’ve finished your plate, even though you don’t really want to and by the end are kind of turned off of steak. At that point the chef is excited to see how much you enjoyed and promises to make an even bigger breakfast!!
Sounds like a funny analogy but really- this is kind of what we (myself included!) sometimes do to our kids. We get so focused on serving sizes and making sure that they get enough that we forget to read their cues and often end up sabotaging the feeding experience as a result.
While I am the “nutrition expert”, I always make sure my clients know that they are the expert of their kid. At the end of the day A PARENTS BEST INDICATOR OF HOW MUCH FOOD YOUR CHILD NEEDS IS THE CHILD YOU HAVE IN FRONT OF YOU. Some kids eat more, some eat less and for some it depends on the day. There are some days where nothing ends up past my kids lips (and I end up cleaning ALOT up from the floor) and some days where I’m fairly certain I have twelve adults running around my house with the amount that is eaten.
So in that vein I propose no rules- but my tips for eyeballing portion sizes for your kiddos.
1.Recognize that that one meal isn’t your child’s only opportunities for nutrition. Children depending on their age need 2-4 servings of calcium rich foods per day. Could this be a glass of milk at every meal? Sure! But could it also translate into snacks of cheese and yogurt and milk at some meals? Definitely! Some kids will have a light breakfast and a massive dinner, some kids like more mini meals at every meal and snack. We need to learn to take a larger perspective on the day rather than looking at the meal that just passed.
2. Kids are really just tiny human beings. As I mentioned, taking certain vitamins and minerals into account, kids need the same things we do just in smaller portions. So to estimate sizing use yourself as a guide and downsize your plate keeping the proportions of 1/2 plate vegetables, 1/4 plate carbohydrates and 1/4 plate of protein rich foods. For children ages 4-8 imagine your plate and divide it in half. So if you would fill your plate with 1 cup rice, a full chicken leg and vegetables, start with 1/2 cup rice, and either a chicken thigh or drumstick. For children 1-3 divide that by half (think 1/4 cup rice and half a chicken thigh). Under one portions tend to look more like servings at a tapas restaurant than a full dish.
2. Know your child can always have more! Children should always be encouraged, and allowed, to eat until they’re full but that doesn’t mean they have to start with the entire portion on their plate. Offer your children smaller servings, and feel free to reload as required. Once you see yourself offering thirds or fourths for a couple of days in a row it might be time to increase the original portion.
3. Never sacrifice volume for exposure. My number one rule of food introduction is exposure, exposure, exposure! Would I rather you serve your child lamb instead of their favourite chicken fingers even though the one bite they’ll try doesn’t come close to their protein needs for the day? You bet’cha! Do I want your child trying broccoli even though they’ll eat their body weight in cucumber every time. Definitely. Every meal for children is a learning experience. It is a chance for them to explore new tastes, textures, and food groups. So rather than focusing on volume and simply encouraging your child to eat more, encourage your child to explore the food. Even if they don’t want to try it that time let them lick it, play with it, dunk it in different sauces. You kids may not eat much of whatever the new food is that time but taking the pressure off of volume at every meal and putting it on exploration significantly increases your chances of seeing them eat it in the future.
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again- as parents, one thing we cannot do is “make” our children eat. So when parents start focusing on ensuring serving sizes and volume they’re setting themselves up for meal time stress. Focus in preparing a balanced meal (always think of plates in 1/2, 1/4, 1/4), letting your kiddo decide how much of it they want to eat and knowing that it is ALWAYS okay to give your kids more if they ask for it!
